Purpose
by Animaster21
Summary: A look into Gaara's mind after Naruto defeated him, and what caused his apology to Temari and Kankuro. One-shot.


**Naruto**

**Purpose**

Hi guys. Wow, this is my first thing I've ever written from the perspective of a canon character. Normally, I deal completely with OC's, so this is a fun experience for me. It's also my first one-shot, how about that?

One of my favourite parts of Naruto is in episode 80, when Gaara tries to understand what drives Naruto to keep fighting, and apologises to his siblings for the first time in his life. I just wanted to explore that a little more, and speculate what happened directly after the apology.

Just a notice: thoughts and flashbacks are in _italics. _If it has "quotation marks", then that's what someone's thinking. If it doesn't, then that's a flashback to what someone else said.

So, let's get started. On with the chapter.

**000**

"That's enough…"

It came as a faint whisper, a strained sentence from a weary body. Temari and Kankurō turned as they heard it, to lay their weary eyes on the broken body of Gaara. He was completely still, staring straight up.

"It's over," he murmured.

"But Gaara…" protested Kankurō, but his heart wasn't in it, and it showed.

Gaara's pale emotionless eyes shifted ever so slightly to look at him. Blood from a forehead wound covered his face, the first time Kankurō had ever seen the substance on his brother. It was shocking to look at; for the first time in his life, Gaara had been completely and utterly defeated. And by that Naruto kid as well.

"_I never thought I'd see this…" _thought Kankurō in disbelief. "_He's had it…"_

The puppeteer shifted, moving to face his brother. Turning his back on the unconscious Naruto and his squad member, Sasuke Uchiha, Kankurō knelt down and slid his arms gently under Gaara's limp body.

"Alright, Gaara," he said gently, heaving his brother up. Temari watched fearfully, and Kankurō didn't blame her; in his entire life, they had never known Gaara to concede a fight. He was ruthless and incapable of emotions aside from hatred and loathing. But here he was, requesting for everything to end. It was too early to tell how much, but there was no doubt; their brother had changed. Whatever had taken place between him and Naruto had affected him on a deeper level than ever before.

Grunting at the effort, Kankurō heaved Gaara's arm over his shoulder, supporting the broken ninja. It was surprising at how difficult he was to lift – Gaara wasn't the only one who was exhausted.

As they stood up – Gaara leaning heavily on Kankurō's body, Temari mirrored them, and together the Sand Siblings turned to face Sasuke. Strange black markings swirled on the Uchiha's body, but Kankurō didn't care to find out what they were. All they needed to do was to leave, to get back to the safety of their own village. Once there, they could fully tend to Gaara. A long recovery would no doubt be needed. Physically _and _mentally.

Kankurō stopped as Gaara lifted his head, but his brother looked not at Sasuke, but at Naruto. Pain filled his eyes, but he did not look away, forcing himself to stare at the boy who had beaten him.

He'd been beaten.

Defeated.

Bested.

And as Sasuke made no move to stop them, Temari and Kankurō leapt into the trees, departing for home. After what felt like so long, the battle was over at last.

**000**

Pain. It was quite strange to be feeling it…to feel this emotion that so defined people. It was unique, Gaara thought. A disconcerting and unpleasurable feeling, but perhaps the most important one. Pain was what had made him, what had shaped him his entire life, he knew. Physical pain had finally reached him, but it was nothing – _nothing_- compared to what he was feeling in his heart.

"_I have…I have to…help myself…Get rid of…this feeling. This ache."_

It was worse than anything he had felt in his entire life. Worse than when he had been rejected. Worse than Yashamaru had died. It was tearing apart, he could barely bear it any more.

_The feeling of being all alone. I know that feeling…I've been there…in that dark and lonely place. But now there are…others._

Gaara flinched as a stab of pain ran through his heart. But it was not the recent fight that had caused it, nor the lack of chakra in his body. Naruto…he had felt it too. To be alone…there was nothing more painful in the world.

But Naruto had others. He had told Gaara, right then when they had been lying there on the forest floor. He had others who loved him….and who he loved even more in return. He wasn't lonely anymore; he fought for them, and they for him.

"_Could that be…what drives him on? Could that be what inspires him to keep going, even when all seems lost and everything is dark? When the walls are closing in and no one is left but you…that is how I feel every moment of every day. My whole life has been a test for me to pass, and until now I felt as if I was succeeding…So what is this pain?"_

It was growing worse with every second, a piercing assault that attacked every part of him at once.

_But now there are…others. Other people who mean a lot to me. I care more about them than I do myself._

How? How could _anyone _have such feelings inside them, to care for another being even more than their own life? What was their motive for diving in front of an attack, risking everything for a single other person? Such a foolish act…but one that kept them going, kept them fighting even when they had no energy left.

"_Naruto…"_

Naruto had kept going. Even as Gaara lay defeated and shattered, Naruto had been just as crushed as he. And yet he had continued, pushing himself further to reach out to Gaara. And he had said…he had said that nothing would stop him from protecting his friends, even if it meant killing Gaara to do it.

He would do anything. Anything to save them, even giving up his own life. Gaara couldn't comprehend it…

_And I won't let anyone hurt them. That's why I won't ever give up…I will stop you…even if I have to kill you!_

_But why? Why would you do this for anyone but yourself?_

_Because they _saved _me from myself._

Gaara almost screamed as the pain intensified even further, driving a thousand searing needles into his heart. He felt empty…alone. He was still alone, after everything! As a child…talking to people, it had resulted in nothing but terrified looks and screaming and running. He had been called a freak, a monster.

He had cried, the torment of being alone tearing him up, even as it was now. It had killed him, his kindness and compassion trodden into the dirt beside his fallen tears. And it had resulted in nothing. That was what made him the way he was. It had made him realise that there was no one in the world worth fighting for but yourself. You're the only one who can understand how you feel, the only one that can comprehend your own feelings.

_Freak! Why don't you die!_

_He's a monster. Don't even look at him._

But Naruto had felt the same…and yet he…he was so different. He loved, he retained his compassion, his feelings for others. And even though he too was a freak, those feelings for others were reciprocated in full. Others followed him, helped him, looked up to him, _loved _him.

Because he had fought through the darkness, where Gaara had fallen. He had kept fighting where Gaara had given up. When Naruto had loved the people who hated him, Gaara had only returned the loathing.

That was their difference.

That was why Naruto kept fighting.

Temari.

Kankurō.

The people in Gaara's life, those who lived alongside him. His family…

"_Do…do they love me? I've done nothing for them to deserve their loyalty."_

His heart ached.

"_I've given them nothing…"_

Naruto.

"_I've rejected their help."_

Shukaku.

"_I ignored them…threatened them…"_

Love.

"_I…They must hate me…They must hate me even as I hated them! How could they not?"_

Yashamaru.

"_Look at what I am! I made myself into what I have been called!"_

Temari.

"_I made myself into the freak. I cast out everyone around me…"_

Kankuro.

"_But now…when I'm at my lowest…when _I've _been brought down to the lowest level…when I'm weak and injured…when I can't fight anymore…"_

Naruto.

"_They're helping me…they came for me."_

"Temari…Kankurō…"

His siblings turned to him, not expecting the sound. Gaara felt everything bursting out…all of his feelings.

"…I'm sorry…"

And as he said the words, Gaara knew that they were true. The ache in his heart died, lessening rapidly.

Temari and Kankurō glanced at each other, and together they realised the conclusion their brother had come to.

"Don't worry about it," said Kankurō quietly.

"No…please….I'm sorry…I'm…so sorry….for everything."

Temari altered her course, moving closer to Kankurō, and jerked her head. Understanding her intentions, Kankurō nodded, and the two landed on a thick branch.

"Gaara…" whispered Temari. "What are you saying?"

Gaara struggled to lift his head, his arm still wrapped around Kankurō's back. "Temari…I…I love you. And Kankurō…I love you both…more than anything else in the world…"

There was a stunned silence as his siblings took in his words. They'd never heard anything like this. Gaara, the hater…he'd never loved anything. Not them, not his father...not even himself.

"Gaara…"

"You…accepted me. You've stuck by me, even….even after all these years…after all I've done…"

Gaara went limp in Kankurō's grasp, as the puppeteer lowered him as gently as he could against the tree trunk. The red-haired ninja's head dropped, and to the surprise of his brother and sister, the first tear in six years slid down his cheek.

"Temari...Kankurō…"

"Oh, Gaara!" Temari sobbed, and suddenly her tears joined that of her brother's. "Gaara…We love you too. We always have, no matter what we said. No matter what you did."

"But…" Gaara's eyes widened in fear. "I…I tried to…kill you. How could you love me…when you were always in danger…? Even as I plotted to murder you…you stayed."

Temari shook her head, her face glistening with tears. "That doesn't matter. You're our brother, we could never leave you on your own!"

Suddenly Gaara spasmed, emotionless eyes suddenly brimming with tears. "My father…our father…he tried to kill _me! _That made me…so angry…so scared. I wanted to let the world know…what I felt. But…that was wrong…No one deserved…what I've done to them."

He dropped his head, an entire lifetime of emotion spilling out at once. Kankurō took a step back in shock, as Gaara wept openly. Temari grasped their brother's shoulders, shoulders wracking as she cried as well.

"Oh Gaara!" Temari sobbed, and her head dropped onto his shoulder. "You're finally awake."

"Gaara…" murmured Kankurō. "Brother…"

"Please…" whispered Gaara. "Home."

Temari nodded, and glanced at Kankurō, who slid Gaara back to his feet. This time, Gaara helped, finding new strength in his legs to lift himself to his feet.

"_Naruto…I see…to have people in your life…they guide you through the hard times…they help you…they feed you…they clothe you…they are friends…people to love…people who will return those feelings. You've forced me to realise…my true purpose in life…to help those around me…even if…even if they call me a freak…or tell me to go away…it is not their fault…they should not be punished for it…I should reach out to them…and help them realise what you've taught me…thank you, Naruto Uzumaki…Thank you for everything you've done. I am sorry."_

The pain was gone. In its place was a deep sense of meaning, a feeling that Gaara had never felt in his entire life.

He was anew.

**000**

So, how'd you like it? Gaara is such a deep character, and his story is so heart-wrenching.

So, what do you think? I haven't had much experience doing this sort of stuff so it might be a little off, but tell me what you think in a review.

Well, that's it from me. I guess I'll see you all some other time ;)

Toodles!


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